The Jar-Jar Experiment

  1. Hypothesis
  2. Observations
  3. Method
  4. Data
  5. Illustrations
  6. Conclusions
  • Hypothesis
      While it is impossible to determine the melting time of an imaginary creature, if that creature is irritating enough it is worthwhile to investigate melting time by proxy. In this case, the subject is one approximately 4.5 in. high figurine of Jar-Jar Binks, species Gungunis Moronicis and native of the planet Naboo.

      Figurine Image
      Figurine Prior to Oven Insertion

      The experiment's hypothesis, based on historic observations of plastics and educated guess, is that the Jar-Jar Binks figurine will take about 45 minutes to melt in a conventional range oven set to 450º Fahrenheit
  • Observations
      Jar-Jar Binks is an amphibious creature with a tendancy to add '-sa' to the end of nouns. More pertinently, the figurine subject is a life-like replica with a scale of near 1:20. The figurine is made of a relatively soft plasticine material of differing densities in different regions. The figurine is held upright by a flexible rubbery base with holes for pegs in the figure's soles.

      The figurine is unremarkable among mass-produced plastic novelty toys and is mercifully not equipped with any noise or speech producing equipment.
  • Method
      First, the figurine will be placed on a surface with relatively low heat conductivity to minimize melting due to contact. Next, the oven will be pre-heated to 450º Fahrenheit. The figurine will be placed in the oven and checked periodically for melting progress. Photographs will be taken to serve as both data and illustrations. Finally, upon melting, the figurine will be removed and allowed to cool before being removed from the surface.
  • Data
      Experiment Apparatus

      Oven Temperature: 450º +/-3º Fahrenheit
      Plate Diameter: 12 in. +/- .5 in.
  • Illustrations
    Figure 1. T-0:00:00

    T-0:00:00

    Figure 2. T+0:09:32

    T+0:09:32

    Figure 3. T+0:012:16

    T+0:012:16

    Figure 4. T+0:015:18

    T+0:015:18

  • Conclusions
      As is evident from the photographic record, onset of melting occurs within 10 minutes and is nearly total within 20, far from the estimated value of 45 minutes. Individual elements of Jar-Jar, including his ears, eyes, legs, and clothing, survived the melting and are still evident in the resulting amorphous blob.

      Figurine After Removal from Oven

      The material that comprised the figurine's legs must have been different in composition from the rest of the body; air bubbles began to form as though the material was beginning to boil. (See above image.) The material that comprised the base was also different from the rest as it failed to comingle with the rest of the melted body and has, subsequent to the taking of the above image, fallen off of the blob.

      In conclusion, it appears that plastic figurines melt readily when exposed to high temperatures; much more so than had been hypothesized. Jar-Jar Binks seems to be a soft creature, belying his amphibious nature. Unfortunately, little more can be cleaned about Jar-Jar's actual person from this experiment. In the future, it may be possible to experiment on the creature itself in hopes of finding a means of reducing the annoyance experienced in its presence.
    Courtesy Of: lameduckie Institute of Technology
    Last Updated: 1/3/01